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I'm bummed. The pug didn't win the Westminter Kennel Club Dog Show. Look at this dog and tell me HOW it didn't win:
Dermot, a pug, waits for his turn to be judged during the Best in Show competition at the 130th annual Westminster Kennel Club dog show , Tuesday, Feb. 14, 2006, in New York. (AP Photo/Kathy Willens)
That is the cutest dog EVER. Especially when compared to the thing that actually did win. Let us look at some photos...
This is a cute dog:
Owner/handler Ken Matthews parades Andy, a golden retriever, in the ring during the Best in Show competition. (AP Photo/Kathy Willens)
This is also a cute dog:
Boomer, a Dalmatian, trots into the ring for the Best in Show competition. (AP Photo/Kathy Willens)
This is not a cute dog. This ... is an alien:
Rufus, a colored bull terrier, holds his pose in the ring after winning Best in Show. (AP Photo/Kathy Willens)
Just when I start to think Mike is McDreamy, he tries to tell me that this monstrosity is "cuuuuuuuuuuuute":
Rufus, a colored bull terrier, poses with his trophy after winning Best in Show. (AP Photo/Kathy Willens)
IT LOOKS LIKE A PERSON!
The only reason Dermot the Pug didn't win was because he uncharacteristically flinched during the judge's examination:
Dermot, a Pug, pulls away from the judge, James Reynolds, while handler, Barry Clothier, looks on in the ring during the judging for Best in Show. (AP Photo/Frank Franklin II)
If not for that, we wouldn't have been subjected to the abomination that was crowned Best In Show. I mean, seriously, even the other dogs have issues with Rufus:
Bear, a Pembroke Welsh Corgi, is rendered mute and blind after seeing Rufus, a colored bull terrier, in the ring. Minutes later, Bear bled tears of vomit out of his eyes and was rushed backstage for emergency veterinary services. Despite looking upon so heinous a creature, Bear is expected to make a full recovery. (AP Photo/Mary Altaffer)
A whippet makes the mistake of looking directly at Rufus, a colored bull terrier, and is momentarily shocked into stunned silence after catching a glimpse of the monstrosity before the judging for Best in Show. After a terror-filled three seconds where the whippet was, effectively, turned to stone, the dog managed to flee the building while barking "MY EYES! MY EYES! IT BURNS!" to the shocked crowd. The whippet's whereabouts are currently unknown. (AP Photo/Mary Altaffer)
Hey now, you're picking 2 of the least flattering photos of Rufus, BTW.
Although, I must admit, the photo commentaries have made my morning....
Posted by: Mike at February 15, 2006 10:37 AMAwww, I'm with Mike. I think Rufus is cute, too.
Posted by: Erika at February 15, 2006 02:42 PMOK, you've forced me Julie. Your silence over the last 12 hours has forced my hand (dammit!)
Think of Marty Feldman. Think of him in "Young Frankenstein".
Now, imagine, that you're doing the good thing. Your dog is six months old, nine months old, and you're doing the good thing by getting him/her spayed/neutered.
You take her there, and she has to spend the night. Vet's orders.
Your come into the Vet place the next day to pick up your pup, and what do you see in front of you? Two folks that have taken in their (twin) pugs for vet treatment.
They each have each dog hefted up and lifted over their shoulder, and you can't help but scratch them over the eyes.
And then they turn around, the owners that is, and they are both wearing HUGE coke-bottle glasses and are worried that you touched {their} dogs.
So, do you do what I did (laugh my fucking ass off), or are you more diplomatic?
Oh, Jee-bus, you should've seen those dogs' eyes.
I will so burn in hell for this.
Posted by: Mike at February 16, 2006 12:05 AMYou ... LAUGHED ... at a pug??!? And not in a "ha-ha you little devils are SO FREAKING CUUUUUUUUUUTE" way?
You dare mock the glory that is the pug?!?
Oh, this changes EVERYTHING!
(Sorry to have forced your hand, Mike. Hands are much better when they're willing.)
Posted by: Highwaygirl at February 16, 2006 06:21 AMNo, I laughed at the owner's eyes. The pugs were just hangin', being their normal puggy selves. The owners, however, had pug eyes like you couldn't believe.
Burning. Eternal. Flames. Hell.
It must be my idle hands. They are the devil's workshop you know.
Posted by: Mike at February 16, 2006 10:31 AMAh, OK. Laughing at people (you're going to hell) is acceptable (you're really going to hell), but laughing (in a handbasket) at innocent little doggies is not.
Posted by: Highwaygirl at February 16, 2006 02:04 PMThat dog is hideous. HID-E-OUS. Your commentary about the dogs injured via direct inspection made me choke with laughter. I'm having rather a hard time breathing. That ugly creature is affecting MY health!
Posted by: rappy at February 16, 2006 03:53 PMI love you, Rappy!
Posted by: Highwaygirl at February 16, 2006 05:51 PM