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November 08, 2004

Spitting Games

Me: *sigh*
Roo: what?
Me: this song makes me feel melancholy
Me: *skips it*
Me: because this is a melancholy-free day!
Roo: oh boy
Roo: did you have morning sex?
Me: *shocked face*
Me: why would you ask such a thing?
Roo: because you are in an EXTRAORDINARILY good mood
Me: can't one just be in a really good mood?
Me: *halo smiley*
Roo: hee
Me: I did have a good morning, yes
Me: I feel like ... a pinball
Roo: eww!
Me: huh?
Me: bouncing off everything, not staying still
Roo: Oh. sorry...I thought that was a sex euphemism
Me: eww!
Me: no!
Roo: I was imagining that little thing that pulls back and hits the ball!
Me: EWW!
Roo: well!

And then later on, just when you think it's safe to go back into the water...

Roo: don't you love it when you go to drink something and instead just pour it down your face? yeah.
Me: I do love that, actually
Me: It reminds me that I am, in essence, a colossal dork
Me: But a loveable, well-meaning one
Roo: ah...well I never need reminding of my own dorkiness
Me: embrace the dork within, that's my motto
Me: (and not the "fork" within, as I first typed)
Roo: sadly, though...my dork is not within, but definitely out
Me: hahahaha
Me: embrace the dork without!

It wouldn't be a Friends entry without some mention of Teem!

Me: I'm going to kill myself or someone like me if Hollywood Video doesn't get "Dawn of the Dead" in stock soon
Rappy: is there no other video store?
Me: no other I have a membership with
Me: Teem rocks
Me: she commented on my site
Rappy: HA!
Rappy: she's insane.
Me: HA!
Me: She's my idol
Rappy: *pouts*
Rappy: I wanna be your idol *WHINE*
Me: You're my idol too
Me: I have a tripartite system of idolatry
Me: You, Teem and Roo
Me: Kinda like ...
Me: Father, Son, Holy Ghost
Me: only not literally
Me: not even figuratively
Me: Since you're, you know, Jewish and stuff

I freely admit that I actually stealered this idea from someone else. So the first one to market wins.

Me: Jake-y Jake-y Jake-yyyyyyyyyyyy
Me: I made you out of clay!
Jake: I'm thinking big posters with that on it... followed by my cell number... plastered all over the city
Me: I can't get behind violence against squirrels, sorry
Jake: hahaha
Me: I already know what my big money-making enterprise will be
Jake: assassin?
Me: Christian strip clubs
Me: Strippin' for Jesus
Jake: ahahahahahahahahahaha
Me: I'm totally serious
Jake: pure genius
Me: I could become a billionaire, easily
Me: Strippers gyrating 'round poles with hymns playing in the background
Me: Or stripping to audio of sermons by Jerry Falwell
Jake: hahhhaahahhaah
Me: Every table has a Bible
Me: and a collection plate
Jake: hahahaha brilliance
Me: Instead of "lap dances" we have "communion cuddles"
Me: Where the stripper feeds the guy a wafer (the body of christ) and a small thimble full of wine (the blood)
Me: I've thought about this, and I think it can work
Jake: hahahahaha billionaire
Me: of course, I will likely be killed by right wing zealots
Me: It's all for the man upstairs
Me: and therefore, pure
Me: Jesus wants you to love your body
Me: or hers
Me: just from afar

A blank canvas, an unmolded lump of clay, and an empty vessel.

Me: to quote Gertrude Stein - "there's no THERE, there"
Roo: exactly

Posted by Highwaygirl on November 8, 2004 03:27 PM to the category Friends
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