This first conversation ends with the most prescient statement I've ever made:
GI Joe: Are you just getting back from lunch?
Me: I went home
Me: I only live 4 miles from the office
GI Joe: What'd you have?
Me: oh, brace yourself
Me: I had...
Me: fat free hot dogs!
Me: on whole wheat buns!
GI Joe: Oooooooooooooooooooooooh!
Me: *head-shaking smiley*
GI Joe: You're silly
Me: thrilling, don't you think?
GI Joe: I really like silly
Me: I'm a goofball
Me: I just wish I could be a professional goofball
Me: I need someone to pay me to BE me
Jake: god this day is dragging ass
Jake: I'm so miserable
Me: would you like a teeny tiny cinnamon graham cracker?
Jake: HELL NO
Jake: no thank you *smiley*
Jake: march 31st will be my last day
Me: I guess I have to change my site
Me: I'm going to cling to your leg as you walk out the door
Me: I'm going to make the biggest scene possible
Jake: it makes so much sense for me to put a weblog out there
Jake: why the hell am I so lazy?
Me: because you're an asshole!
Jake: that's the spirit!
Me: you can't leave, Jake!
Me: who will be bitter for me?
Me: who will put a cynical spin on my every happy moment?
Jake: in the end
Jake: there can be only one
Jake: I have taught you well
Jake: go now
Jake: into the world
Jake: and spread the misery
Me: *cries softly*
Me: aww, someone left a sweet comment on me site
Jake: You and your deceitful ways
Jake: Talking of happiness
Jake: and the "GOOD" life
Jake: I shall expose you for the demon you are
Jake: THE WORLD IS A COLD PLACE
Jake: people must know the truth
Jake: NOTHING MATTERS
Jake: NONE OF IT
Jake: NOTHING WE DO
Jake: In a million years the sun is going to burn out anyway and nothing will be remembered
Jake: nothing will matter
Jake: SAY IT
Jake: tell them
Jake hacks so loudly I can hear it from my desk, 30 feet away
Jake: fucking cough
Jake: see what you've done to me
Jake: you and your god
Me: Jake, I am going to miss you so much
Me: it makes me sad to think about it
Me: but stop hacking, idiot-boy
Jake: I just spit in my garbage can
Jake: How's that for a lovely picture?
Me: I feel so special now
Me: you've ruined a lovely moment!
Jake: Yeah, I'm good at that